The Automatik

“Take care and have respect for each other. Keep the faith and never let the sycophants and small minded people of this world get you down.”
-Statement from the official Placebo web site on the release of their single, “Special K”
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Murderecords, 1999

I’m sure the die-hard Sloan fans would call me a late bloomer for so recently seeing their videos, but give me a break! MTV sucks and I don’t get a lot of MuchMusic exposure.
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Murderecords, 1999

The N.S.
I love the way the song fades in, quietly entering the room before announcing its presence without a lot of undue fanfare. It sounds uncannily like Double Fantasy-era John Lennon with Andrew’s typical clear, strong vocals, then it changes into a spiffy little piano melody. Only Sloan could rhyme “ocean” with “Nova Scotian” and not sound too cheeky. It’s the perfect length and stops on a dime.
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Disclaimer: I want to make it clear that in NO WAY am I a fan of Trent Reznor OR his music. In fact, I think he’s quite a Jim Foetus rip-off. It just amuses me that I have this knack for bumping into him at the same places over and over again. But it isn’t like I plan it or anything. In fact, I think it could be argued that he’s stalking ME!
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Something is wrong with the world when I start feeling less annoyed by crappy bands like Korn, Rage Against the Machine, or Crazy Town in the face of bands like Godsmack, Full Devil Jacket, and Linkin Park. Even Moby and Gwen Stefani now seem appealing. At least Gwen is a more positive role model than the singer from Snake River Conspiracy. Wes Borland from Limp Bizkit (you know, the one that looks like a mime on crack) has a new album out called Big Dumb Face. And while I am sure that it is more than his face that is dumb, even that doesn’t turn my stomach like Mudvayne, who must be seen and heard to be believed. MTV2 has a special on this week about “new artists” and Mudvayne is being spotlighted. Riiiiiiight. They are artists in the way an infant is an artist when it craps in its diaper.
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The most appalling video that I have seen recently, and probably of all time, is Robbie Williams’ “Rock D.J.”
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Forget Oasis. If you really want to hear the legacy of the Beatles, you should listen to Sloan. I hate to even compare them to anyone, but trust me, it’s fitting. It’s a crime that Creed and Limp Bizkit CDs have sold a gazillion copies because Sloan are the saviors of rock and roll music that we’ve all been waiting for.
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This past spring, for the first time ever, and with no ironic intentions, I went to see Rick Springfield live. What can I say? It was amazing. Never mind that he’s old enough to be my dad, he’s still actually cute. A few more wrinkles around the eyes maybe, but that winning smile is still there.
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Imagine the scene: You’re sitting in a bar, sometime during the mid-’90s, and lamenting the crappy music on the jukebox and the room full of bad Marilyn Manson clones. Then, miraculously, you suddenly overhear the following conversation, a sarcastic, yet clearly besotted nostalgia trip through ’80s fashion icons in the world of pop music. It might go something like this:
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